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We want someone else in the city.

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Put on your best clothes, check. Speed to the station, check. Pay parking ticket, check. Stand behind the yellow line, check. Take the train, check. Step out of the train along with countless bobbing heads, all walking fast, almost speeding with you like competitive eight-year-olds, check. Behold numerous larger-than-life billboards inside buildings, some reckoning you to move to warm Arizona, but all making you feel like someone important (just like a super hero), check.

About a decade ago, I worked in the city. Since then, I found a job in the suburbs as my family grew. A training course propelled me to take the train to the city for three days in February of this year. I went as a tourist, as an outsider.

In the decade of departure from the city, I had forgotten the energy that flourished in the city, the young that made even the middle-aged people like me, feel important, if only along the neck-to-neck walk with them.

The bustling cafes, the trendy clothes…ah, the list goes on.

My past years witnessed my ex-company relocate to the city. I  heard of numerous others embarking on the same journey. Why?

When I had questioned my previous employer why, they said they wanted to tap into the younger, bustling crowd, go where the momentum was.

In that reasoning to move to the city, I was also hearing, I was aging. They wanted the fresh folks, just graduated with new ideas. When did experience become underrated? Hint, salaries. Why bother gaining experience when (relatively) cheaper labor can be readily available?

Are there no old people in the city? Sure, there are. They may live there. They may well commute there. They may be valued. But for the vast majority of my peers with little children moving with a company to downtown meant sacrificing family life and not seeing daylight at home.

The company probably was more interesting in my budding children than me.

This is the harsh reality for the tech industry. I wish I knew the exact formula for success past forty, as I have yet to reach that milestone as fast as it is approaching, but bubbling in the hustle of downtown Chicago, observing the fresh new faces, their confidence, I also wondered if merely moving the location of a company was a guarantee of a company’s success.

Because a great company should value talent, regardless of geography or age or gender or color. And when large corporations make such decisions to aim for profit at the cost of signaling the lack of value of employees’ personal lives or experience, it is a two-way street. They too lose in key fundamentals that make a place worth working for, period.

I spent the three days in city savoring the delectable food in the restaurants, staring out the train window listening to blasting music. But the most cherished part of my day remained coming back to a loving home. For companies can move where they wish and can be replaced but the truly irreplaceable parts of my life were taken care of. I enjoyed the oomph of the city and was afresh proud of my decision to remain close to family, so I could take pride in my work as a professional and as a mother at the same time. Downtown Chicago can continue to bubble with energy, and I with love. Maybe, some day when my kids have grown up, and I have more of “me” time in the day, a startup that distinguishes not between old and young, and only sees talent, will reckon me to check all the checks and take the train to the city and feel young again.

Until then…here is to another day, and another week in suburban Chicago.

By Mars D. Gill

From an early age I wanted to make connections with people from across the globe. Allowing emotions to escape the deep recesses of one’s mind, and be spilled into a sheet of paper for the world to read lays an opportunity for reader and writer to combine in a nameless bond, one of oneness, and intrigue. It bares a private part of the writer for all to see. It is daunting and exciting. If a written word can dissipate the worry from another heart, if a written word can bring to a face a smile or a tear, then that connection is complete, and a word shatters the physical distance and brings souls together in harmony and joy. This is my dream, only a dream at the moment.

When I was 15 years old, we got a new English teacher. She spoke so beautifully and clearly and made me want to be a better person. Despite my age-old struggle with language(s), I was fascinated by the world of writing. My teacher inspired me to be a constant memory keeper. I feel at some level she taught me how to think.

Now years later, I am blessed with a career and a family that keeps me busy. However it is that 15-year-old in me that is knocking on my heart and via this little personal web site, urging for outlet for my life-long aspirations of writing and as well as begging for validation of all the dreams, old and new that just do not go away. So, here I am on word press with my own website to see where my dreams take me.

4 replies on “We want someone else in the city.”

Ah! You touched on an experience I had as a mid-30’s single person but with a corporate move in the opposite direction – I went from working in downtown Chicago to the northwest suburbs. I realized the first day when I drove solo in my car that sure it was convenient, but I missed the the train ride and exercising walk to work from the station. Instead I had a walk of 100 yards from the parking lot to the building. Lunch time was a real letdown. Instead of walking anywhere I wanted in the loop, I had to get in my car and drive to somewhere to eat. Again, no exercise! And then my suburban office had few, if any singles, and after work social outings were limited. I loved the job and gradually met others in my life mode and didn’t feel so much like a “fish out of water”. When I had to go downtown on occasion for business, I was always reminded of the richness of the hustle, sounds, smells and sights lacking in the suburbs.

Once I married and we became parents, I understood the advantage of not working downtown. It’s tough to catch the train for that soccer practice at 4:00 p.m. And family is our most important priority in life, agreed.

I wonder about those who live downtown with their young family. How does that work? You’d have the best of both worlds.

Your words kindle my memories of working downtown in my youth and again mid-career. The commute hasn’t changed much…I still visit family members who prefer to live in Chicago. It is an exciting place but it can take its toll on the family as you point out in your blog.

I see young families who appear to make it work. However, there must be sacrifices in the size of their homes, the quality of the children’s schools, and safety. It is possible to overcome the drawbacks with high incomes. I guess it is all about choices.

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